Li ti ena enn non, enn sourir, bann proze, kapav bann zanfan ki pe atann li lakaz, kapav enn valiz ki li ti koumans prepare dan so larmwar, sa valiz ki nou fer kan noun resi pran desizion pou ale. Li pa'nn gagn letan…
Dan lemond, asterla mem, enn fam inn mor parski so mari, sa dimoun ki ti dir “mo kontan twa”, inn touy li. Pa dan enn fim, ni dan enn fe-diver bien lwin ek abstre, me dan enn vre lakaz, dann enn vre lavi, avek enn vre lekor ki pa pou leve zame.
Feminisid, sa mo ki nou ankor anbarase pou prononse. Koumadir si nou met enn non lorla li tro egzazere. Koumadir bann sif, bann figir, bann prenon parkor ase pou konvink dimoun ki nou pa pe koz enn size la, me enn irzans.
Zordi, nou pou koz lorla, san detour, san pas diber. Parski sertin realite pa merit ki nou kasiet zot.
Ki savedir vremem feminisid ?
Kan nou koz feminisid, nou fer referans a krim lor enn madam oubien enn tifi akoz so zanr. Samem form pli extrem, pli ireversib, bann violans ki kapav fer bann fam. Dan mazorite ka, dimoun ki deryer se enn zom ki viktim-la ti kone, enn partener, enn ex, enn manb so fami.
Nou pa pe koz enn krim pasionel la. Sa expresion, zoli pou lizie ek ranpli avek mansonz la zis minimiz seki li ete vremem : enn akt dominasion, enn akt posesion, enn zom ki telman konsidere ki enn fam pou li ki li panse li ena drwa deside ki fam-la nepli bizin egziste.
Feminisid li pa laboutisman enn lagir ki'nn mal tourne, me laboutisman enn sistem, enn kiltir. Enn long lasenn violans ki'nn ignore, minimize, tolere, ziska ariv enn pwin non- retour.
🔎 Eski to ti kone ?
Dan lemond, sak onz minit, enn fam mor parski enn partener oubien enn manb so fami inn touy li. Sa sif-la, ki'nn piblie par ONU, reprezant zis bann ka ki resanse. Komie lezot ka ankor ki zame konte ?
Dan Moris ? Sa zil ki fer bann touris dan lemond antie reve la kasiet enn realite ki bokou prefer deklar pa'nn trouve. Isi, bann ka feminisid inn ogmante dan enn fason ki fer per. Bann fam ki pe mor kot zot, dan lame zot konzwin, dan bann lakaz ordiner bann kartie ordiner. Bann non ki aparet lor tou zournal, dan tou aktialite de-trwa zour, apre disparet lor bann lekran. Bann fami devaste, bann zanfan ki'nn vinn orfelin enn sel kout, ek enn sosiete ki tro souvan zis lev zepol ek dir “ti ena bann problem dan koup-la”.
Non, li pa ti zis bann problem dan koup me bann feminisid ek zot merit apel zot par zot vre non.
Feminisid, realite bokou fam ki bokou desid pou ignore
Kifer ena otan ka ki pa denonse ?
Samem parti ki kapav pli difisil pou tande parski li obliz nou get enn realite inkonfortab an fas. Laplipar bann fam ki viv bann violans : fizik, psikolozik, sexiel, pa koze. Tou pa fer sa par swa me parski zot per. Zot per pa krwar zot, per bann konsekans, per perdi zot zanfan, zot lakaz, zot stabilite finansie, per briz fami, sa gro presion sosial ki dir bann fam zot bizin tini, pardone ek aprann viv avek sa.
Apre ena enn lot form laper, ki kapav pli paralizan. Sa laper tourn ver bann institision ki sipoze protez zot…ek retrouv zot anfas avek enn miray. Parski bann lalwa lor bann violans konzigal ek feminisid flou, pa ase ni aplike touletan dan plizir pei ek Moris pa enn eksepsion. Bann prosedir long ek fatigan. Parfwa bann ordonans proteksion vini tro tar ek sertin fam ki'nn oze port plint retrouv zot devan enn sistem ki retourn zot lakaz, kot zot bouro. Koumsamem zot res trankil ek parfwa silans kapav kout zot zot lavi. Li pa enn mank kouraz, me enn mank soutien.
Seki sa bann fam-la viv avan ariv pwin non-retour
Feminisid pa sorti dan nean, me li anonse avan li vini, bien avan. Atraver enn long eskalad violans ki lantouraz viktim-la trouve parfwa ek zame met enn non lorla.
Koumansman : kontrol
Kot to pe ale ? Avek kisannla ? Kifer to pe rant tar ? Kifer to'nn abiy koumsa ? Enn izolman progresif avek bann kamarad ek fami, ziska li vinn sel linver ki posib.
Apre, bann mo
Sa bann fraz ki inprim zot ek fini par resanble laverite. “ To pa vo nanye san mwa. Personn pa pou oule twa apart mwa. To enn inkapab. To ti bizin dir mwa mersi”. Bann mo ki brize san les bann tras blesir vizib.
Bann kou
Pa touletan, me souvan, me kan zot arive, zot ariv avek bann exkiz, bann larm, bann promes. Ek fam-la, fatige, tousel, destabilize, krwar ankor, parski li bizin krwar, li pena swa. Parski ale pli konplike ki sa paret kan pa twa ki pe viv sa.
Menas final
"Si to ale, mo touy twa”.
Sa fraz-la, bann milie fam tann sa toulezour ek bann milie fam krwar ladan parski zot konn dimoun ki pe dir sa la bien, zot kone li kapav fer li.
Bann seki ale pran enn vre risk. Bann statistik formel : moman pli danzere pou enn fam ki viktim violans konzigal, se kan li desid pou kit so partener. Risk omisid ogmante dan enn manier dramatik dan bann semenn ki swiv enn separasion. Li kone, me pourtan, li bizin ale, parski reste savedir li pou mor mem, zis ki li pou pli lant.
Enn sosiete ki prefer deklar pa trouve
Komie fwa apre enn dram to'nn tann bann vwazin dir : “Nou ti pe tann bann lagir, me nou ti pa ti anvi rant ladan” ?
Komie fwa fami inn prefer gard silans pou pa etal bann problem ?
Komie fwa bann koleg inn trouv bann tras kou, bann lizie gonfle, bann tranbleman ek pa'nn dir nanye ?
Feminisid li pa zis krim enn zom. Li rezilta enn sosiete ki'nn prefer deklar pa trouve si. Enn sosiete ki minimize, ki normalize, ki dir “ zot lavi prive sa” ziska sa zour kot nepli ena lavi ditou la arive.
Sak silans otour enn fam ki an danze li enn konplisite involonter. Inn ariv ler ki nou pran konsians ansam.
Seki bizin sanze, asterla mem
Bann lalwa kler, presi ek sever pou respe drwa bann fam
Bann definision legal pou feminisid ki permet pourswiv ek kondann avek riger seki sa krim-la egzize.
Bann ordonans proteksion ki aplike ek respekte vremem.
Bann lapolis ek lezot dimoun ki forme pou resevwar parol bann viktim san minimiz li.
Bann eberzman irzans ki aksesib.
Bann led finansie pou bann fam ki kit zot lakaz enn sel kout.
Enn akonpagnman psikolozik ek ziridik depi premie alert.
Enn ledikasion, depi bien zenn, lor konsantman, respe, egalite, parski feminisid konstrir bien avan premie kou. Li konstrir dan bann krwayans lor ki savedir posed enn fam ki nou transmet bann garson.
Enn mesaz pou twa ki pe lir sa ek ki pe viv enn sitiasion difisil
Si kan to pe lir sa lartik-la enn zafer pe rezone, si enn parti seki to'nn lir resanble to lavi, oubien lavi enn dimoun ki to kontan, pa afront sa tousel. KOZE : avek enn asosiasion, enn dokter, enn lalign ekout. Premier etap li pa ale, li zis briz silans, avek enn dimoun, enn sel. To merit enn lavi san laper, enn vre lavi.
FAQ : to bann kestion lor feminisid
Ki definision ziridik feminisid ?
Legalman nou definir feminisid kouma enn krim kont enn fam akoz so zanr. Dan sertin pei, li rekonet kouma enn kategori penal spesifik avek bann santans agrave. Dan bann lezot pei kouma Moris, sa rekonesans legal specifik la pa ase swa absan. Samem ki rann bann pourswit mwins sistematik ek bann kondanasion mwins sever.
Kifer bann fam ki viktim violans pa koze ?
Parski ale li pa enn zafer sinp. Ena bokou obstak ki bien prezan : depandans finansie, izolman sosial, laper bann konsekans, enn mank bann striktir lakey, presion familial ek kiltirel. Ek sirtou parski period ki vinn apre separasion li statistikman pli danzere. Ale nesesit enn soutien ek proteksion ki bokou fam pena.
Kouma ed enn pros ki viv bann violans konzigal ?
- Pa bizin ziz li
- Pa bizin dir li “ kifer to reste”
- Fer li konpran bien ki “to kapav kont lor mwa”, san okenn presion, san forse, san inpoze.
- Ed li idantifie bann resours ki li ena : bann asosiasion, bann la lign lekout, bann eberzman irzans
- Si to panse li an danze ek bien bizin led, pa ezite kontakte bann lotorite.
Bann ka feminisid pe ogmante dan Moris ?
Bann informasion ki disponib indike ki wi bann ka feminisid ek violans kont bann fam dan Moris pe res ogmante. Bann asosiasion lokal souvan fer remarke ki pena ase resours ni kad legal ek ki kantite fam ki oze denonse bien tigit. Bann irzans ki pei-la nepli kapav permet li reporte se : tou dimoun pran konsians ek ena enn reform lezislatif.
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